When I recall back on everything that has happened this year there's so much more pain to it. Acts upon weakness and stupidity. It's amazing what we let our guard down to do, and even more amazing that when we step back and finally see the bigger picture of things, we realise how much we really do for the other people in our lives & sometimes I wonder... when am I going to step up and really take care of myself? When will I really understand that I'm going to be the one and only person who's going be there from start to finish. I tell people this all the time... But now I find it silly because I can't see it myself. I know it's there... I just can't act upon it. I keep wanting a break from it all sometimes... and I know that's human, but how far can I really run away & how long can I stay there for.
Don't you just hate the fact that the easy way out if things always feels better?
Because that's a lie. Things are always going to turn out better, even if it's a little bit. But it's that little bit we gotta live for. I've been telling myself all year that "I don't care" when in fact by the end of my stupid charade, I really do.
Why do we spend our whole lives trying to figure out who we are... I don't really think It's something you can really figure out. It's on your death bed that you finally see how far you've come & see what type of person you are... Because you cannot possibly figure it all out when you're still living. It's like how life isn't set in stone, neither is who you are so don't try to figure it out when you're not even finished. Just set goals strive to succeed.
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